"No. I haven’t found my birth parents." (yet?)
This will be a short post to be added onto later—sleep calls:
I am delving into adoptee literature—mostly, books like, The Language of Blood (Jeong Trenka) and the wealth of blogs. I have not had such a visceral experience while reading in a long time.
That said, a lot of the well-publicized narratives center on adoptees who have reunited with their birth families. This does not negate their experience, but it adds a layer, one that adoptees like me who have not yet found our birth families or have circumstances preventing a reunion cannot resonate with. For adoptees who have found their birth parents, it seems like a complete circle, a return to the prequel, answers. For me, I can best explain how I feel with a visual—a dashed circle. My life is continuous—I don’t ascribe to the believe that airplane day signifies a “new beginning.” But there are pieces that happened and were seemingly erased since while I can’t remember them, but they affect me.
Bottom line: I would like to hear more of adoptees like us, voices of adoptees who might have permanent question marks etched into our personal narratives. I plan on starting to share more of my story and I encourage you to do the same! I’m following Janet Mock (#girlslikeus) and using #adopteeslikeus for future posts in this vein.
P.S. I appreciate the courage of ALL adoptees who share their stories with the candor and grace I’ve seen so far.